TRAILER: The Department of Variance of Somewhere, Ohio

[00:00:01] Hey, is this a drill?

[00:00:05] Where should I go?

[00:00:07] We're in asymmetry then.

[00:00:08] This is worse than I thought.

[00:00:09] This isn't gonna make much sense right now, but this building can move.

[00:00:13] Keep this receiver on you.

[00:00:15] If you get stuck or you see something that doesn't make sense, give me a call.

[00:00:18] The best way to succeed is to submit.

[00:00:22] Submit to the will of your pinstripe gods.

[00:00:26] Scarlet, pick up!

[00:00:28] There's something here.

[00:00:30] It's huge and...

[00:00:31] That's what we call a lark.

[00:00:33] I don't know who it used to be, but that's what it is now.

[00:00:36] None of this makes any sense.

[00:00:38] What the hell have you people gotten me into?

[00:00:41] Nothing here makes sense.

[00:00:42] Get used to it.

[00:00:43] Welcome to the Department of Variance Control.

[00:00:46] Scarlet John, over and out.

[00:00:49] The Department of Variance of Somewhere, Ohio is a new sci-fi horror audio drama by Rat Grimes,

[00:00:54] creator of the Dead Letter Office of Somewhere, Ohio.

[00:00:58] The Department of Variance is a full cast serial fiction podcast about a shady governmental group

[00:01:02] that experiences a containment breach at its main office.

[00:01:05] One new hire and one mid-level employee from the Bureau of Transnatural Resources,

[00:01:10] named Jasmine Control and Scarlet John, are stuck on different floors when a lockdown begins.

[00:01:15] The two must communicate and get to the bottom of the building however they can.

[00:01:19] Not all is as it seems in the department, however.

[00:01:22] Beginning December 7th and airing weekly, listen wherever you get your podcasts

[00:01:26] or go to SomewhereOhio.com or Patreon.com slash SomewhereOhio for more information.

[00:01:31] The department thanks you for your time.